Monday, May 02, 2005

Not about teeth, really.

This is a message for Jordan’s Mom for Jordan: My dear, my experience with sushi is sadly lacking. I look forward to meeting you in person so you can help me learn to appreciate it. You’ll probably even have to order for me! Would you mind, terribly?

To Robert: Thank you for your kind words for me and the frank words about your own experiences. I would love to display your photos. I think anyone who read your comments would want to see what you choose to show us. Please do.

I spoke with a good friend on the phone today. He listened quietly as I told him about how my life was going and, after a thoughtful pause, said. “So, you’re fucked.” (That, for me, by the way, marks the difference between friends and people who say things to make you feel better.)
It’s true, but it could be worse. Mostly, if I’m awake, I’m working very hard. But, the work is good. A movie wouldn’t kill me though, or a full night’s sleep or dinner, sitting down. That sounds good.
Overall, for the time being, he is right.
Everything has a price

If I don’t stop drinking so much coffee I’m going to have to wear strips on my teeth every weekend for the rest of my life. That or I could resign myself to tan teeth. Or I could tan my skin---at least neutralize the blue---the contrast alone would help.
But who has time? Actually, I do. It’s the desert. Five minutes a day, sitting by the pool. But then there’s the health thing. But mostly it’s the sitting thing. I don’t sit. Hey---think it’s the coffee? Tom? Feel free to jump in any time. I could read, or write something instead of just sitting. Or I could tan and wear strips and start to look as though I live in Palm Springs, except that my tennis dress must be at the cleaners…
I am not giving up coffee. I could decide I don’t care if my teeth are brown. But, for now, I do. For now, it’s strips. Everything has a price.

Last week I decided that I didn’t like being ten pounds over what I think is my ideal weight, which is about two pounds over what the laminated pamphlet hanging by the register at the pharmacy says is my ideal weight. So I started a whole foods diet. I was looking forward to the energy and even thinking I might put a barre up again and bend and stretch and toe... I decided that whole foods are what you serve to people you expressly don’t like.
I simply bought some new pants. And made lasagna. Everything has a price.

Everything has a price. I say this a lot. You could substitute “choice” for “thing”. It’s like a mantra. Learn it. The worst you can do is never again be reeled in by a single hook that starts with the word “free”. There is no “free”. It goes against the laws of the universe. If it says “free”, it is a lie.
Is that a bad thing? No!! Not necessarily.
Actions have consequences. The glass can just as easily be considered half full, grasshopper.

And, if you’re wondering, this does not count as a sermon. If you ticked it off on your “I was good” list in ink, you’re fucked too. See? Everything has a price.

Orion is sleeping and I’m going now to pack up lots of art, and cast the first Harlan Ellison rat. I took photos of the molding/casting thing. Will post them when the rat is finished.


What? Posted by Hello


Carl V. Anderson said...

Now that you mention it you did manage to sneak through the weekend without a Sunday sermon!

Hooray for having good friends...isn't it marvelous how one of the most wonderfully versatile words in the English language can be used to succinctly sum up one's current life circumstances.

I recommend the movie...sleep is overrated!

Anonymous said...

So, you're fucked

Friends who will speak frankly and with earnest intent are priceless beyond measure. Situationally you may be fucked, but as long as you have friends that support you without coddling you, I don;t think anyone is truly fucked. It is when one has surrounded themselves with so-called friends who specialize in "blue smoke and sunshine" enemas that achieving a state of being truly fucked is close at hand.

I decided that whole foods are what you serve to people you expressly don’t like. I simply bought some new pants. And made lasagna.

I am _so_ glad that I was not drinking out of my 20 oz mug of coffee when I read this. There are too many things that could take serious damage from the forceful nasal discharge of the Elixir of Life. And besides, it hurts my nose when that happens. But really, what is the point of life if not to enjoy life? Not some mythical state of Happinesss (which, I believe is where Theory is located, where I wouldn't mind living briefly since everything works in Theory), but the act of experiencing and enjoying life for what it is.

And if the choice is between being 10 pounds over the optimal weight whilst enjoying some new food or drink (or something familiar for that matter), vs. forcing oneself to consume the raw materials of Dr. Crapper's Colon Cleanser in order to meet some magic weight, I think I know which one I would choose. But it would be a choice I made for myself, knowing full well the consequences of my actions... which brings us to:

Everything has a price, or perhaps a little more wordily c/o Larry Niven, There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch

And quite frankly, I can't put it more succinctly that you already have. I can only add that refusing to acknowledge the cost/benefit/cause/effect nature of things won't make it go away... so it is better to accept that this is the way the universe works, and plan accordingly.

Off my soapbox and up the stairs for more coffee. So much time, so little to do... strike that, reverse it.

-- Ravyn's Consort --

Anonymous said...

Nope, not at all.