Saturday, January 15, 2011

Day 27

So. What've I got for you today? Right. I still feel like crap. The things that I don't like about my life are pestering me to no end. I remind myself that pain and sadness are a natural part of life. After all, there's always something. That fucking something.
Then, really, what would we do without it? Silly humans.
The only sane thing to do is to get over it and move on.

I walked past Orion's room a few minutes ago. They're in there now, four humans, each playing together, separately, on integrated DSI.

It is the present I see. And the past. They might, at a glance, seem to be separated, but then they yell in unison, laughing and shouting challenges at each other. They could just as easily be four kids playing with sticks and bones.
But they just had Cookie Crisp. Over- priced and over -sugared mini cookies that are really just one more form of corn.

And the best way to eat corn is in moderation.

I pause. This is worth saying again. The best way to eat corn is in moderation. All of us.

Or, we can just keep eating nothing but corn and doing all the things we're doing now and change only when things get so dire we have no choice. Which is what is most likely to happen, as this is the approach to change practiced by humanity for all time.

It's gambling, for sure, because if things get dire enough, we run the risk of not getting the opportunity to change. This has happened countless times in the story of this planet. Species come and go. Life is short, everything is eventual and nothing lasts forever.
But then, that's not my problem or yours. Because we cannot control what the species does. We can only control what we do. I can only control what I do. And even then, only within the constraints of my situation. But the impact of changes I can make could be profound for me, and those immediately connected to me. Same for you. Same for all of us.
So, in a nutshell: We're sort of fucked. It's not my fault. I'm not completely powerless.

I can make a list of all the things I want to change--like eating and buying less corn products--but I won't. Lists don't work for me. What works for me is simply to develop my vision to be mindful. If I want to change, I must look at everything through that filter and pay attention. That will affect every decision I make. Maintaining that mindfulness requires effort, but gets easier with practice.
Another round of yelling. They could be four kids playing at shells and sticks. Thing is, there are four kids playing at shells and sticks somewhere else on this planet today, right now, who live lives so different from this one as to be alien, but who are every bit our human family.
More laughter, cheers, challenges from Orion's room. Maybe the things that should change will. Maybe the things we get right, like playing together, will stay. Silly humans.


spacedlaw said...

I would not have though corn as a cookie ingredient. Not necessarily. Wheat, yes. Oats, possibly. Corn belongs to the why not limbo, something to tempt the cook out of a well traveled path, where bad wolves might lurk (as well as fat caterpillars smoking hookahs).

lisa said...

spacedlaw: me either. Cookie Crisp is actually a cereal. But when you start to read the ingredients, it's everywhere. And I mean, everywhere.

ravyn said...

Lisa, a filmmaker friend of mine made a short film you might like. i'll talk to her about getting a copy to you.

Ciarra Thompson said...

First of all, I just found your blog today..and I love the way you write, truthful, yet witty and hilarious. Secondly, we share a lot of the same opinions. I, too, am fearful for the future of our species, and strive to do everything in my power to change it, but like you person can only do so much. We can change the way we interact with the world, but we can't make the rest of humanity do the same. Also, I agree with the idea of eating less corn-based products. It is sad that cheap additives that increase the profit margins of huge corporations are being added to our foods at the expense of human health. I recently made an effort to eliminate High Fructose Corn syrup from my diet completely, and as I'm sure you know, that shit is in everything! Anyways, I'm a new follower and just wanted to say hi. We seem to have a similar mindset, so if you feel so inclined you can check out my blog.

P.S. I love Bill Hicks, he was a genius.