Saturday, January 15, 2011
So. What've I got for you today? Right. I still feel like crap. The things that I don't like about my life are pestering me to no end. I remind myself that pain and sadness are a natural part of life. After all, there's always something. That fucking something.
Then, really, what would we do without it? Silly humans.
The only sane thing to do is to get over it and move on.
I walked past Orion's room a few minutes ago. They're in there now, four humans, each playing together, separately, on integrated DSI.
It is the present I see. And the past. They might, at a glance, seem to be separated, but then they yell in unison, laughing and shouting challenges at each other. They could just as easily be four kids playing with sticks and bones.
But they just had Cookie Crisp. Over- priced and over -sugared mini cookies that are really just one more form of corn.
And the best way to eat corn is in moderation.
I pause. This is worth saying again. The best way to eat corn is in moderation. All of us.
Or, we can just keep eating nothing but corn and doing all the things we're doing now and change only when things get so dire we have no choice. Which is what is most likely to happen, as this is the approach to change practiced by humanity for all time.
It's gambling, for sure, because if things get dire enough, we run the risk of not getting the opportunity to change. This has happened countless times in the story of this planet. Species come and go. Life is short, everything is eventual and nothing lasts forever.
But then, that's not my problem or yours. Because we cannot control what the species does. We can only control what we do. I can only control what I do. And even then, only within the constraints of my situation. But the impact of changes I can make could be profound for me, and those immediately connected to me. Same for you. Same for all of us.
So, in a nutshell: We're sort of fucked. It's not my fault. I'm not completely powerless.
I can make a list of all the things I want to change--like eating and buying less corn products--but I won't. Lists don't work for me. What works for me is simply to develop my vision to be mindful. If I want to change, I must look at everything through that filter and pay attention. That will affect every decision I make. Maintaining that mindfulness requires effort, but gets easier with practice.
Another round of yelling. They could be four kids playing at shells and sticks. Thing is, there are four kids playing at shells and sticks somewhere else on this planet today, right now, who live lives so different from this one as to be alien, but who are every bit our human family.
More laughter, cheers, challenges from Orion's room. Maybe the things that should change will. Maybe the things we get right, like playing together, will stay. Silly humans.